I was in 5th grade when I had my first kiss! FIFTH GRADE! What on earth! That’s the age of my youngest child right now and he has no clue, like no clue what any of that even means. I’ve told my kids this and seriously, they are like, mom you are disgusting. It just adds on to the fact that I also got bad grades in school so their mantra is to not be like mom! LOL!! Back to Heather in 5th grade. So this young lad was in my life for a year. That’s right! I even knew how to do long relationships. I mean, who wouldn’t want me as their role model. We did everything together. My life revolved around him. I remember this so vividly. Why do I entertain you with this beautiful piece of my life? Well because even at this early of an age, my value was placed in someone else’s hands. Not that it was his fault, it was just where I placed him.
In my therapy session the other day, we had a lovely and fierce convo on where my value comes from. It’s a bit jacked up, which I’m sure there’s some of you in the same boat. Truth be told, I don’t even think we realize how others dictate our emotions until some nasty stuff starts rising up and next thing ya know we are 3 glasses in or a gallon of ice cream is gone. Our relationship with ourselves is the most important relationship we can have outside of Jesus. What we feel, think, believe about ourselves makes or breaks any kind of relationship we have with others. Sometimes we get stuck in our heads, believing the thoughts and feelings, well, really the lies, our minds are telling us. This world has us playing out scenarios in our heads. If I’m pretty enough, or talented enough, or liked enough, or have enough stuff, or dating the coolest guy, then I’ll be acceptable to all. Well that’s just a load of crap. We are valuable not because of who we are but because of who God is. Here me out. I know that sounds a bit cheesy but when you are loved unconditionally with all the awkwardness and quirkiness you bring, doesn’t it make you think that maybe we’ve set our value in the wrong hands? I mean, allowing our value to be rested in Christ takes a lot of pressure off of us. Think of it this way. Could you imagine someone asking you, why do you like me? And you responded with some kind of trait they have. Next thing you know, they feel like they need to be the best in that all the time. That’s not how our loving Jesus works. When we ask Christ why do you love me? His response is, because you’re my child. BAM! And scene! There’s no restriction or rules. There’s no list of qualities that you must have. Gosh darn, how freeing is that?!
Where are you at today? If you step back and really look deep inside, are you at peace? Are you able to turn off all things around you and realize the true love of just your existence? Jesus says, “You are precious in my eyes, you are honored, and I love you.” Isaiah 43:4a Just read that a few times and let it sink in. You are loved and valued just because you are you. My prayer is that you can own that and rest in that.
“If you value yourself, you understand that you are a gift to anyone you meet.”