They Don’t Get To Decide

I don’t believe things happen by accident.  I don’t believe that people come into our lives by accident whether we want them to walk in or not.  Each person or each instance shapes our story and molds who we become. In the end, we decide how we react to it.  

It was the summer between my junior and senior years of high school.  I auditioned to tour with a christian singing group around the US and throughout Europe.  Pretty sweet right? At the time, I was dating a hmmmmm……what should we call him……..so many words but shouldn’t speak them, so we shall say, not so nice boy, ha, at the time. BUT, he had me wrapped around his finger. We’d been dating for a few years and there had been abuse there so needless to say, leaving was good for me, just didn’t see it till later. Our group stopped at my church, he came, and she came.  Yep, you know that gut feeling when a friend of yours sits down next to your boyfriend and you just know. I confronted him in the short time I had to see him and total denial. Yea, ok. I believed him because I was completely like that and toured the rest of the summer. Got home. Got dumped. Found out he was cheating on me with her the whole time I was gone. Surprise! Surprise! And why you ask? She gave him what he wanted if you know what I mean. He had to fight me to get a very small amount. I had boundaries. Was I devastated?  For sure, but man, I truly believe that was one of the biggest steps I needed to realize it was time for me to stand up for ME. That wasn’t love. I didn’t deserve what I was in but assumed that love looked like that. I needed a big slap in the face in order to see it. 

I love how this happened to me right after I had this amazing experience with my Jesus, singing all over the place.  You are never prepared to be broken but I knew I could fall back in the arms of my Father. Psalm 91:4 says, ‘He will shelter you with his wings, you will find safety under his wings. His faithfulness is like a shield or a protective wall.”  Situations, people, circumstances, they come, and we don’t have a choice.  Many can mess with our heads or lead us to believe we are lost or broken or walking down a wrong path but I’m here to tell you that we decide what that outcome is.  We get to decide how we react to the challenges that we didn’t ask for. Will we allow them to break us or will we rest into the arms of our Creator and be like, dude, you are gonna need to run the show cause this one through me for a loop.  He is all over it. Truth be told, He does a much better job. 

“Don’t get upset with people or situations.  Both are powerless without your reaction.”

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