It’s You

Philippians 4:13 (MEV)

“I can do all things because of Christ who strengthens me.”

Sharp objects were constantly taking out of my apartment.  The whole ‘out of sight, out of mind’ thing was where everyone was going with it.  Maybe if it just wasn’t around or visible, she wouldn’t want to hurt herself. I wish that was the case, but no.  I mean, it was a bit deeper my friends, which I think everyone understood but doing something tangibly at least felt like they were doing something, right?  I saw that after the fact but at the time I was like, seriously?! Because honestly, there’s a store around the corner and pretty sure they sell knives or any other sharp object. I….I needed to want to not have sharp objects around.  I needed to want to not hurt myself anymore. I needed to WANT to get better and I was the only one who could decide that. Now, I took the hard road in which I had to hit all the way to the bottom, almost death, in order to decide and see that healing was possible but hey, at least I got there! Ha! In the end though, I couldn’t depend on everyone else to fix what they couldn’t ever fix.  Let me tell you, boy did I want someone too though. Someone please just make this all go away.  

Isn’t that the case?  We sometimes look everywhere or towards everyone else to help what really only we can help. I still struggle with this today.  I still look on the outward to fill the inward. I still have a tendency to define where my healing is at by my circumstances or how the world is treating me that day. It’s a rough way to keep going though.  When I was at my darkest, it was so hard for me to see that it was me that needed to want to get better. Of course, leaning on others is definitely important, but in the end, who is it for? In the end, who is the one that will eventually scream out to God and say, ‘I’m done!’……’Please Help Me!’  It’s us my friends. You may be in a really difficult time right now, wanting to throw in the towel or maybe you are in a place where Jesus has brought you through that dark spot. You looked deep inside and connected with the light. On either side of these circumstances you may be in, I’m gonna tell you now that there’s a depth of strength inside of you that will grow if you just tap into it. Jesus has talked about how we have the same power that raised Him from the grave inside of us!  WHAT?! I mean, sit on that for a sec. That’s powerful, so powerful! We’ve gotta dig into that and jump ship from the crap around. I know it’s not easy, heck, sitting in the yuck feels familiar and sometimes comforting cause it’s all you’ve ever known BUT there’s more for you. There was more for me and I had no idea! I’m so grateful I touched the depths of that strength and just kept going. You can too. You’ve got this! One day at a time, little by little, you will stand tall. 

“Deep inside of you is more strength than you’ve ever known.”

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